Moment

So it's one year as of today that I confessed how I felt to Nathan... Funny I thought that I was never going to get the chance cause I thought I blew it in 2005. And here we are a year later, a lot has happened in a year... We got together, got married and now he's deployed. I was at my sister in laws last night celebrating the turning of the year. Around 11 at night I just couldn't take it so I left and went home. I turned the radio on and listened to the countdown to midnight and begin to cry. I had a moment last night... a moment where I really missed my husband, a moment in thinking of the year before and wishing he was home. All military wives understand these moments when their husband is gone but it's hard to understand for others. They look at it as if we choose to be down... we don't. We go everyday fighting our emotions to gain strength and pray everyday for the safety of our Marine. We go days and weeks without communication and still manage though it's hard. So don't tell me to stay and drink... don't tell me I am doing this to myself, don't tell me I was like this on Christmas... don't tell me anything unless you know exactly how I feel, until then don't tell me anything just be there for me. I know I chose this life I chose to be his wife... I chose us and I know it's going to be hard... as I'm sure there are hard times for anyone and they want to have their "Moment" Moments when the son moves out or the daughter gets married or their spouse decided to leave or you get in a car accident... we all have moments in our life where it's okay to break down, that others in this world may never experience... so don't tell me I'm doing it to myself don't remind me I chose this life... when having moments help people move forward.