You Knew he was Leaving...

So I took Nathan's advice from the flower and went out... it was Dinner and a Movie cause eveybody was going... Annette and Chris, Crystal and Murphy, Courtney and Jody. Amber and Travis were supposed to go but they couldn't get a sitter... I wasn't going to go but Crystal and Annette wanted me to go since my in laws were watching all the kids... it was a Adult night that just happened to be Valentines.... not that I care about celebrating this day... We ate at Papasitos... it was okay. Gerri and my momma asked if I was going to be okay with going out with couples and I thought I would be. I remained positive there but I have learned to put that fake smile on my face and act like Nothing is wrong, I mean who wants to be around a party pooper... everyone was joking around about Sex and even Annette was like umm you're probably thinking thanks guys, but hey I could handle it and joked with everyone... and then everyone had to thrown in their 2 cents about how I knew he was a Marine and he was getting deployed yada yada yada... so I decided not to go to the movie... one because it was raining and I hate driving in the rain... 2 I had a headache that seemed to be getting worse... 3 I missed him

So when I got home I wrote Nathan an Email just a crying... It's like they (they meaning my fam and friends) don't understand what or how I feel and they don't take the time to do so... I mean yes we did get married knowing he was going over there for a while but that doesn't mean that I stop loving him or I don't have the right to miss him because I knew he'd be gone... I do miss him everyday and I'm head over heals in love with him and this is so damn hard but I do it, I suck it up and push through another day cause it's the only thing that gets me closer to him... I stay strong and talk about how he is doing when people ask about him without crying, but I never get asked "Hey Katie how are you doing"... It sucks and hurts to be fake and stay strong even when I'm not... and it's like when I need someone to talk to when I need that shoulder to cry on because I feel like I'm gonna break and I want someone to tell me it's gonna be okay.... they go away or change the subject or it's back to You knew he was leaving...

Loss

We found out that Annette lost the Baby today. I am back at work trying to keep it together. I walked in and she just started to cry. I just wonder why do things like this happen to good people. I mean I tried to remain positive and comfort her, and just said there was somthing the matter that God knew you and Chris can't handle, and to tell that to the Girls. I mean what do you say I'm just at a loss of words and hurting for my sister and best friend in one...

I got home Friday knowing that I was a dumb ass this week by ruining my Suprise but I knew it was going to be there... so here they are...

So I went with Annette, Chris and the kiddos to the in-laws Ranch yesterday and got some more good shots of the Girls, Phoebe came along too!

It was good to be out there haven't been there since Nathan was home in April and I got to see the Damage that Ike did to the House... Annette's Belly is getting big, I can't wait to see him and meet him... I can't wait until Nathan comes home and gets to meet his Nephew!!! I have bought all this stuff for Caleb and want to give it to her so she can start putting it in his room!

Caleb Aaron

So Annette, she's one of my besties and sister in law is expecting. We found out Monday that is was a boy!! So I went to her house yesterday to see what teh Name was going to be. I guess you can see that in my title... but yep it's Caleb Aaron... I like it, but it's going to have to grow on me just because we have Chris (my brother in law) Christian (my 10 yr old niece) and Cadyn (my 3 yr old niece) so it's a name that fits but I think the "b" is throwing me for a loop... LOL anyways just wanted to share. I can't wait to get her baby shower going... I'm so excited for them!!! In a way it kinda make me want a baby too, but at the same time no... though I know when I find out everyone will be just as excited!!!

Oh and I happend to get a picture of Cadyn while I was there with the new Camera!!! I ♥ hers!!!